During this time of Crisis

During this Time of Crisis

The world has abruptly and without warning found itself in a crisis.  It’s easy to find ourselves confused and in a panic.  Many of us are still in shock or denial over the sudden changes and empty store shelves.  Negative, scary, and worst-scene scenarios demand to plague our thoughts.   While we cannot control what is going on around us, we can know that our Heavenly Father is faithful and in complete control of our circumstances.  I invite you to consider taking this time as an opportunity to strengthen your faith in God and your relationship with your family.  

What you can do:

Take the necessary precautions. 

Take the necessary precautions needed to insure the health of your family.  I encourage you do to this balancing necessity without panic.

Recognize and acknowledge your emotions.  

• It’s ok to feel sad, afraid, angry, or disappointed.  Allow yourself to feel what you feel.  Look for healthy ways to cope with your feelings.  It’s ok to cry.
• Validate your spouse’s and children’s feelings.  When they feel sad or afraid, rather than telling them there is nothing to be sad or afraid about, find out what they are thinking. 
• Look for opportunities to reassure your family. 

Limit your news intake.  

The news often pushes our emotions whether its anger, fear, or excitement.  Often the story is focused on doom and gloom.  There is information and misinformation.  It can get confusing.  Stay tuned enough to be informed, but limit your news intake in order to keep you and your family’s emotional health in balance.

Allow yourself and your family to acknowledge any losses.

1. Make a list with your kids that allows them to name the bad or negative feelings and losses they are experiencing during this season of change.  It may be missing their friends or a cancelled trip to Disneyland.  You might make a list in a notebook, on posterboard or on slips of paper in a box.  Be creative in whatever way fits your family.
2. After you have listed any losses, make a second list writing down all the good things that are happening as a result of the pandemic.  This might include getting to sleep later in the morning or getting to stay at home and play games with the family. 
3. Sit down with your spouse and make similar lists.  On the lists you might name the bigger concerns or losses that you have without the little ones present in order that you do not over burden your children. Put truth to your negative thoughts.  If your thought is “I am going to lose my job.”  Put truth to the negative thought.  “I might lose my job, but there is a good chance I won’t lose my job, and if I do God will help us get through these tough times.”

Take this time to teach your children about their family.

After 9/11, psychologist discovered that the children who knew the most about their families were the most resilient.  They found that these children displayed more sense of control over their lives,  higher self-esteem, and a greater belief that their families were successful.

• Pull out any scrapbooks, albums, or pictures that you have of you and your growing up family.  Share the stories that surround the pictures.  Talk about your pets, your friends, your adventures.
• Share stories of your family’s ability to bounce back from difficult times.  Focus on the positive moments.
• Start your own family scrapbook.  Your children will cherish this as they get older.  Be sure to give your scrapbook a name.  
• If you are an adoptive family and have contact with your child’s birth parents, this would be a great opportunity to contact them to see how they are doing and if they need anything. Your child may be wondering about them and chances are they are wondering about about you too. Have your child write a letter or make a card for their birth family. If you are not in contact, put it in a special place to be sent at another possible time.

Remember God is still in control.

God is still in control.  He sees you and knows all about you.  He is there waiting for you to run to Him in times of need.  His promises are for today.  Here are a few verses of encouragement from Bible.

• Proverbs 18:10 The name of the Lord is a strong tower; The righteous run to it and are safe.
• Psalm 46:10 Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the heavens.
• Psalm 46:1  God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
• Philippians 4:7  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Get the help you need.

Should life feel too overwhelming, allow yourself to get the help you need.  Call a friend, or family member.  I also want to encourage you to call a therapist or counselor.  Many are available by phone and/or video.

Kim Turner, M.A.
Licensed Clinical Christian Counselor
Commissioned Minister of Pastoral Care
Birds on a Wire Counseling